We are witnessing a rise in suicides ever since coronavirus lockdown has happened. At the same time many of us fear asking our loved ones about suicidal thoughts thinking it might instigate them further. Ms Shourya Gupta,Consultant Clinical Psychologist working at The Lifestyle Clinic New Delhi busts some myths about suicide and shares her views on how we can prevent them.
According to the World Health Organization (2014), suicidal behaviour is a global cause of death and disability. Worldwide, suicide is the fifteenth leading cause of death, which accounts for 1.4% of all deaths. In total, more than 8 lakh people die by suicide every year. And India has one of the world’s highest rate of suicides among people aged between 15 years and 29 years and it is the leading cause for death in this age group (Suicide Prevention India Foundation). The psychological and social impact of suicide on the family and society is beyond measure. On an average, a single suicide intimately affects at least six other people. If a suicide occurs in a school or workplace it has an impact on hundreds of people.
During the current COVID-19 Pandemic, we are experiencing that the rate of suicide is increasing immensely. We even hear famous actors and doctors from esteemed institutions dying by suicide. The possible reasons at this time can be financial losses, unemployment, domestic violence, increased rate of mental illnesses, failed relationships, loneliness and isolation. Thus, by any measure, there is an urgency to better understand and prevent suicide and suicidal behaviour.
Let us first look at some of the Risk Factors of Suicide –
- Psychiatric Disorders, particularly depression, alcoholism and some personality disorders
- Abuse of any kind
- Misuse of alcohol or any other drug
- Access to lethal means
- Knowing someone who died by suicide, particularly a family member
- Chronic Disease (terminal, painful or debilitating illness like AIDS, Cancer, etc.) or Disability
- Lack of access to behavioural health care
- Belonging to marginalized social groups
- Previous suicide attempts
- Divorced, widowed or single status
- Living alone (being socially isolated)
- Unemployment or retirement
- Bereavement (loss of a loved one)
- Marital separation
- Family disturbances
- Caregiver burnout
- Change in occupational or financial status
- Rejection by a significant person
- Shame and threat of being found guilty
According to a study by Owens, Horrocks and House (2002), around 80 per cent of people with suicidal tendencies show warning signs like making statements like “I wish I were dead”, “I’m going to end it all”, “If (such and such) doesn’t happen, I will kill myself”, “I’m tired of my life, I just can’t go on with it”, “My family would be better off without me”, “Who cares if I’m dead anyway”, “Pretty soon you won’t have to worry about me” and behavioural signs like finishing off their unfinished businesses, transferring their responsibilities, money and property or priced possessions to their loved and trusted ones, getting materials related to suicide execution like pills, rope, blade, poison, etc. Thus, 80 per cent of the suicides that happen can be prevented with a proper identification and intervention.
How to help someone with Suicidal Thoughts?
The QPR (Question-Persuade-Refer) Approach –
1. Question
It is a common myth that if you ask someone if they are having suicidal thoughts or not, it will trigger them even more. No, it is not the truth. It rather makes them feel more understood and it assures them that their feelings are valid and they can share more about their feelings with you. Thus, Questioning is a very important step to help someone with suicidal thoughts. Some of the ways by which you can question them are –
“Have you ever wanted to stop living?”
“You look pretty miserable. And when many people feel the way you do, they think about killing themselves. Are you also thinking like that?”
“Have you been unhappy with your life lately?”
“Do you ever wish you could go to sleep and never wake up?”
“Do all the things that you are going through make you feel like you want to give up?”
Remember, when in doubt, do not wait, just ask the question. If the person is reluctant, be persistent with them and make sure you talk to them in a private setting.
2. Persuade
While listening to their problems, give them your full attention and do not rush to any judgement. Offer for hope in any form and persuade them to get help. Ask them to promise that they will not take any such step until they get help. Your willingness to listen and to help can instill hope and make all the difference.
3. Refer
Suicidal people often believe that they cannot be helped. First, get a commitment from them to accept help and then make arrangements to get that help. Take them directly to a Mental Health Professional for a consultation, who will then work on all the underlying issues. Keep motivating and supporting them throughout their treatment process, if you cannot be with them all the time, make sure someone trusted from their family is informed about their condition.
Remember, not being judged negatively, being treated with kindness and acceptance, being affirmed that they are a worthy and a valuable person, being allowed to fully express their thoughts and feelings and being socially connected can work wonders in protecting the person from attempting suicide.
Be vigilant! Taking the right actions can save lives!!
